I have to share the story behind the Field of Penises bit, because I love it so.
My roommate/co-worker/online friend at the time, Korp, was freaking out about something. He was legit freaking out over Ventrilo with the entire gaming crew on. I can’t remember over what. I had never heard him panic before, so I was trying to think of a way to calm him down. The only thing that came to mind was “He likes PENISES!”
So I got into this soothing voice where I said “You’re running through a field of penises. Its like a cornfield, but instead of cornstalk, its just miles and miles of penises, reaching up into the air. An entire field of penises! As you’re running through the field of penises, they slap across your face, ever so gently! And you keep running and running, through the never ending field of penises-“
And at that point, everyone was screaming at me to shut the fuck up.
Vajazzling is so 2011. This year, for those who are looking to get adventurous in decorating their lady bits, it’s all about gluing on feathers and fur. And dried macaroni and glitter. No, the dried macaroni and glitter will be next year.
You scored 40 Heterosexuality, 30 Homosexuality, and 24 Asexuality!
You scored 84 Heterosexuality, 11 Homosexuality, and 22 Asexuality!
You scored 58 Heterosexuality, 30 Homosexuality, and 25 Asexuality!
You scored 67 Heterosexuality, 36 Homosexuality, and 6 Asexuality!
You scored 73 Heterosexuality, 49 Homosexuality, and 16 Asexuality!
You scored 24 Heterosexuality, 79 Homosexuality, and 14 Asexuality!
You scored 49 Heterosexuality, 38 Homosexuality, and 31 Asexuality!
You’re highly sexed but do not appear to be interested in either gender.
Huh, well, I wouldn’t say that per se…
I do have interest, it just kinda comes and goes most of the time.
You scored 64 Heterosexuality, 53 Homosexuality, and 25 Asexuality!
You scored 97 Homosexuality, 0 Heterosexuality and 3 Asexuality!
I think the 3 Asexuality is due to the fact that I like to cuddle occasionally and it’s not full on fucking 24/7 in our household. We are bears. Bears cuddle the fuck out of each other before and after all the fucking.
You scored 56% Heterosexuality, 38% Homosexuality, and 12% on Asexuality
You scored 73 Heterosexuality, 30 Homosexuality, and 14 Asexuality!
In real life, little about James was as genteel as that song. The platinum blonde’s first hit was a saucy R&B number about sex, and she was known as a hell-raiser who had tempestuous relationships with her family, her men and the music industry. Then she spent years battling a drug addiction that she admitted sapped away at her great talents.
In other words, she was one of music’s original bad girls.